Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Gospel of Joseph Stalin, Episode 4: The 'Tudes

Secretary General and Loving Father Stalin, who only sends those who really need it to Siberia to be worked to death. Photo taken by CCCP, public domain for all good comrades. Here



Blessed are the poor, for they shall receive random roads in places they never go to,
Blessed are the meek, for they have not noticed what DC is doing in the past few months,
Blessed are the lowly in heart, for repeating "yes we can" makes them instantly happy,
Blessed are the bankers, for they shall inherit the earth,
Blessed are the malleable, for they shall change easily,
Blessed are the merciful, for I shall mention them briefly in a speech,
Blessed are the elderly, for they shall inherit huge amounts of government spending and by the time we're ready to pay, they'll be dead,
Blessed are those who agree with me, for I will listen to your praise.

But woe to you manufacturers, for ye shall be enslaved by congress,
Woe to you rich, for ye shall be taxed,
Woe to you proud, because I'm the only one allowed to be egotistical,
Woe to you consumers, for health has been declared a voluntary activity like driving,
Woe to you strong, for ye shall struggle,
Woe to you merciless, because by the time this is done, you'll have killed somebody,
Woe to you young, for ye shall hunger,
Woe to you who do not agree with me, for ye shall burn in anger.

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